ADHD Self-love: Beat Resistance on Valentine’s Day

This is a different post than I usually write.


 I recently read the book, The War of Art, by Steven Pressfield.  To say it changed my mindset would be an understatement.  To say it enlightened my thinking about ADHD is strange because of this quote:

“Attention Deficit Disorder, Seasonal Affect Disorder, Social Anxiety Disorder.  These aren’t diseases, they’re marketing ploys.  Doctors didn’t discover them, copywriters did.  Marketing Departments did.  Drug companies did.” (Pressfield, 77).

If your body temperature rose and you’re about to throw your computer out the window, right now.  Take heart. Pressfield has a point.

I have a theory.  I was “cured” of ADHD before I even had it.

As a child, my mother’s household ran like a tight ship.  She was extremely loving, but had HIGH expectations of order, and ACTION.  No one was sitting around watching much TV in my mother’s house.  There was work to be done.




There are plenty of articles that discuss structure and discipline in detail.  Those two forces explain why my ADHD never showed up until my college years.  When I moved out of that structured environment, I floundered.  It took me 6 years to complete college and find my calling in education because of RESISTANCE.


Steven Pressfield’s book purports Resistance poetically and undeniably.


“. . .any act that rejects immediate gratification in favor of long-term growth, health or integrity.  . . .any act that derives from our higher nature instead of our lower.  Any of these will elicit Resistance,” (42).



Resistance Recognition


So, ADHDers.  In a nutshell, convenience, risk-aversion and immediate gratification all encourage Resistance.  Is Resistance killing your financial independence plan?  What about your anniversary trip to Thailand?  Or the plan to fix up the starter house and get it ready for sale?  What about the masters degree in Psychology so you can help others with ADHD?




The constant inaction in our life (dishes, beds unmade, ordering food instead of cooking) builds Resistance.

According to Pressfield, this inaction around our plans develops emotional turmoil.  It derives from not putting into action that which you were meant to do.  


The Invisible Battle

It’s time to beat Resistance.  Day by day, week by week, blog post by blog post.  Throughout year one and year two of writing your book about parenting, or fitness.  By taking six months to find a job that fits, or learning how to cook by doing, we battle Resistance.






In honor of Valentine’s Day, I’m promoting self-love for ADHDers.  Love yourself enough to take action against Resistance.




What has resistance stolen from you?  What will you take action on?  Leave a comment below.  The first step is writing it down.





Published by Family ADDventures

Nicole Santiago is a learning specialist, student advocate, and founder of Family ADDventures. As a specialist, she assesses and teaches clients (adults and adolescents) to manage and grow their executive functioning skills which include emotional regulation, task initiation, and time management. As an advocate (IEP coach), she is a member of COPAA and ensures inclusive (special) education students receive the most appropriate educational services possible. She often collaborates with OT's, SLP's and neuropsychologists all in the name of student improvement and success. Her practice is located in San Antonio, TX, and everywhere (virtually). The author grew up an army brat and spends time with her three ND children and husband in Puerto Rico whenever possible. She writes about mental health, parenting, education, and entrepreneurship on her blog:

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